Okay, I am going to try to explain how to explain-- no, I am going to express how it feels to feel old.
There are varying degrees of old, and for the most part one can be old, or feel old, or both be and feel old. For me, I think I've always been immature or child-like in my behavior and lifestyle. In a way, I like this because it makes me feel youthful. More importantly, I think that kids enjoy life more on a basic level. They play. They are fascinated by common things.
Well, recently I feel like I just woke up suddenly one day and realized I am at the stage of my life that young'uns look forward to. It's the point between adolescence and adulthood. Yeah, I know that adolescence varies between individuals and maybe I'm not exactly at the point anymore, but instead past it. But it's just weird that when I look all around me, people are still growing and have their whole future ahead of them, while I am in my future. Maybe it' s not exactly the future I was planning, but it is a future.
A year from now, I will see if my new plans have come to fruition. Hopefully, with a little more do and a little less reliance on lady luck, I will be in a position to do what I want to do.